Sad Days

The time has come for me to give up everything,
The time has come for me to say i Dowant,
I feel sad, I feel that i cant take it anymore, all this while i was trying to hold everything up,
but i just cant, there is up to one level only i can take everything...
All this while, i thought that i was the everything, but today i realize, that I am not,
How can i be with him when i am not as important as others to him?
I feel lonely now,
I feel unwanted,
I feel useless,
How can he treat me this way?
How can he have the heart to do like this to me?
If thats the question, I should be asking myself weather he has a heart or not!!!
All this while, i tought i can take the hurt, but today, when i was left unwanted,
I couldnt take it already...
When i asked him, he said "i was waiting for you to call me"
Why must i make the first move everything??
Itz always me.,,, sometimes i think that he should make the effort to do so.
Life,
what am i suppose to do now?

Relationship

When two people, a gal and a guy is in a relationship,
does it like sound so fun? is relationship meant to be fun?
Well, people say, there are ups and downs in a relationship, but what if there is more downs
then ups?
isnt relationship has to have a balance of ups and downs?
I would really dream to have such a relationship, but i dont,
lucky people deserve such a relationship, as for me, i am a very unlucky person,
i get some ups time in my relationship, but for a person like me,
thats not enough, i feel that i deserve better, but how to
leave a relationship without getting hurt, i just dont wanna go thru more hurt,
i dont wanna hurt the other person, being with me is a great thing for that person,
being with him is also a great thing for me, but what happens when things change,
i feel like just getting out from everything and running away,
i feel like giving up everything, going somewhere, cry cry cry and cry for a long period of time
and then come back to life (reality)
when i come back to reality itz will hurt of course,
stupid mistakess causes heartbreaks,
but why doesnt people understand that?
How many times will they repeat their stupid mistakes?
I am just so fed up with that,
Just when i tot he understands me the best, and he is going to be there for me and with me
forever and ever, thats when he has to change things areound us
make more stupid mistakes...........
LIFE!!!!